COVID rant

Now, as a mid-Pandemic blog, I feel it to be my duty, and my utmost honour, to have a post regarding this virus wrecking the world. Also, I can't just ignore its existence, and I need to vent a little. It's called "rant"ers' reign, okay? 

So the third wave is about to come. In October, they predict. And I’m not even angry at this point; just annoyed and disappointed. Like, okay, how many? 3 seems like a really good number to stop, dear COVID.

 

In 8^th grade (2019), when New Year was around, and it was almost 2020, I found something scribbled on a desk.

“Me: 2020! Yay! New Year!

1720- Plague
1820- Pandemic

1920- Plague

Oh sh*t”

So, yea, this person predicted the pandemic.

 

1720-23: The Great Plague of Marseille

1817-24: Cholera Pandemic

1918-1920: Spanish Flu

 

The years are a bit messed up, but you get the idea. So, this pandemic can last for anywhere between 7 to 2 years. Not excited yet? There’s more! We have vaccine for ONE variant out of 4. And some extremely top-notch smart folks are resistant to get that vaccine. Some even smarter folks think its absolutely okay to go out after being vaccinated. Not like they straight up disrespect the other three variants, but okay.

Indian’s have honestly crossed every limit of dumbness and idiocrasy at this point. People are going to Shimla and Manali “because it’s been so long since we travelled because of the pandemic” Yea and that pandemic is totally not still going on, and you’re totally not going to be the complete reason for the third wave, right?

You know, I, like many others, hated the pandemic and wanted to know why on god’s green earth would mother nature put us through this, because, like ‘mother’ nature. But then, I thought, maybe it’s a natural population control method, BUT OH BOY WAS I WRONG!!! The population wasn’t affected the slightest bit, because of course it wasn’t! We’re at 7.9 billion, which is basically 8 billion. Every living organism’s life, by the rule of nature, is extremely centric around reproducing and maintaining population. MAINTAIN population, not to EXPONENTIALLY INCREASE IT TILL THE EARTH EXPLODES!!

Hi! So, I do an average of one post a month, which is extremely less to say the least. But, even this needs to come to a halt now. I have my boards coming up, and so do you. After them, I might revamp everything a little, you know, improve my schedule, become better at blogging, etc etc. (this 'etc' definitely does not include me making a new site and no, I'm not lying right now to keep it a surprise)

A late night mistake

 Dude, its literally 2:25 am right now, and I just realized....I write a blog....Like, damn! And secondly, its a humour blog. Blogs are like, the worst way of humour. I can't have visuals, tones, sketches, anything...And I never had a way with words....This whole thing really makes me want to start a YouTube channel...But like, then I feel, I'm not even that funny...Not to mention, no one will allow it...Why am I even writing this post? Like, I'm not going to put about this on my status...And no one checks my blog daily....Guess you found this while reading another post....I have a test tomorrow.....What am I even doing with my life..?....Writing a useless blog...*drowns in existentialism crisis*

Quotes Part 2 (More like Sayings)

So some may say these sayings were meant to be poetic and that I'm ruining their beauty, but they aren't undisputable. Now, you may argue that all sayings are disputable, which, No. For example: 

Accents are not a measure of human intelligence. The ones who speak differently only speak your language with the rules of theirs.

- A beautiful poetess I luckily know

Let's begin exploiting loopholes!

Okay so this is just plain dumb. Its like, what? Whoever made this clearly undermined the potential of human creativity and stupidity. Here's a few things that are impossible: A Wednesday after a Monday, Water turning into oil as you drink it, me not wasting time, not loosing hair ties, 3 and 7 adding up to 12 etc etc. A lot of things are impossible. And if they creator meant that doing the activity "nothing" in not possible, then also, I do nothing all the time, so please.

This tries to say that, to begin something big, we must start doing it, take the first step. I agree. But what this misses out on, is the fact that then we need to make a second step, like, don't stop once you start. If just one step would solve the problem, then all the 16 drafts I have would be actual posts.

All I see here is an opportunity for calorie counting freaks, and an excuse to be sad. 

"iTs eXeRciSe, iM nOt sAd"

[Authors Note: I found some really good sayings while trying to find some material for this, so yea, its not all bad, I'm just a nit-picker]

After this one, google images gave up on me. I couldn't find anything worth my words. So I went to the haven of all dumb motivation, *drumroll please* INSTAGRAM!! And man! This is BAD.

1. I didn't make this up, this is an actual Instagram account. No, I can't believe this person exists either.

2. Bro, who rejected you? This honestly sounds like a typical case of "I followed and stalked a girl around, but then she dated a guy who respected her, so that's cheating"

3. Don't go to that page and give hate. That's why I didn't write down the Insta handle. Dumb or not, we shouldn't hate. (*Welcome to another episode of Suhanee being a pure Hufflepuff*)

Are they....are they advising to slacking? Like, just do your work for the sake of finishing it. I am so confused by this one. How...is just 'doing' BETTER than doing it perfectly?

I hope they know that they don't HAVE to like women. Like, dude we get it. Its okay if you're not attracted to women. We don't hate here. Oh wait! These are the same people who think its unmanly to be gay! 

Neeraj Chopra....got a gold....That.....WHAT?! He's been getting golds for years, so what are you trying to say??!!

IS THAT THE TACTIC CATCALLERS USED??!! OHhhhhh NOW I GET IT. Thanks bro.

Okay I am officially done with torturing myself with these posts. And remember how I saw some good posts? Yea screw that. I found a ton of objectification and shaming to cancel that out. So yea. Bye.

How to get views?

A post from Ranters Reign? Yes, that's right! The sleeping beauty has woken up from her slumber. I wanted to post so bad, but I couldn't think of anything.

Okay so, yes the title isn't clickbait, or readbait, or whatever you wanna call it. Now, these days, everyone has a YouTube channel. So here are Top 5 Ways to Get Views from a random girl on the internet who doesn't have a YouTube Channel!

Number 5

Make a video on a controversial topic with extremely radical views. Hate or not, views are views ;)

Number 4

Pretend you are collabing with a big YouTuber, even though you are not. Just lie......

Well I mean it worked for these guys-

(6IX9INE wasn't in the video)

Number 3

Use clickbait. Make the title and thumbnail have something which the video only talks about for 1/10th of it. Again, hate or not, views are views ;)

Number 2

Make a video about Brexit. People are going to be so confused, that they will keep rewatching it.

But I mean you gotta understand Brexit yourself first, for which you need to understand the EU and UK and all the international relationships sooo....

Number 1

Make actually good content so that people want to watch it.

---Ze End---

Flat Earthers 🌏

Oh boy! This ones gonna be quite a ride!

So, as I mentioned earlier, I am a space nerd. And, as you can see from the title, I am offended by the fact that flat earthers exist. Like, that's the height of stupidity!

So I, unfortunately, recently downloaded Instagram. And, even more unfortunately, I stumbled upon #flatearth and fell down the rabbit hole. Long story short, my brain is fried, my heart aches, and I've given up on humanity 

If you are a lucky bean and aren't aware of the existence of flat earthers, I got you covered. They is a community of crackheads who all believe that the earth is flat, and not a globe. Why? Because it *seems* flat. Yes. They actually say this. That we can't see the curve in earth. So its flat. Then why are we taught that its a globe? PROPOGANDA!! OF COURSE!! I swear, just- Oh god.

So, look, here's the thing: Something as big as the earth just can't be flat. It just can't. Every object has a 'centre of gravity' (which is a fancy term meaning the source of the pull). So something as monstrously huge as the earth would collapse into itself and become a sphere. Which means we are back to where we started. 

But after hearing this, the flat earthers were like "Hmm. Okay folks! Gravity is made up as well!" I- What?! Asdfghjkljkhurebvwjgfqvmlrqiel.

I am lost for words. If you, like myself, are interested in the science part, then I really recommend you to go to youtube where people which are professionals in space (which I am not) take up every argument flat earthers make and roast the hell out of them using science.

The first question that comes to ones mind "Why would everyone fake that the earth is a globe?" "BECAUSE THERE IS MORE OF EARTH OUT THERE, AND WE HAVE BEEN BOUNDED BY A WALL, CALLED ANTARCTIC SO THAT CAPITALISTS CAN HAVE THE EARTH BEYOND THAT TO THEMSELVES!!" Sir, if the earth was a frickin disk, there would be an Indian kid, hanging off the edge, clicking selfies.

They also say "THEN WHY DO WE USE MAPS??" Well sir, have you tried using a globe to mark the Harappan Civilization and the flow of Narmada in an exam? How convenient would that be!! Every map is wrong, because *the earth is a globe* and you can't fit a globe on a rectangle. Maps are dis-proportional and distorted.

This was physically and mentally painful for me (I cried while researching for this). So I wanted to end it on a good note.

😁

(Also, I'm taking suggestions. Comment what you want me to write about. I have no idea what to write.)

Languages (I basically bully English)

 Languages. We use them. We basically can't live without them. But there are a bazillion languages, so, the world decided that, to communicate with one-another, we need a Universal Language. Which language did they choose? English. Why? Colonial Hangover. Britain had conquered almost all the world, and imposed its amazing language, English, on all its colonies. And even after they left, the colonies couldn't stop using them.

Now, there's no big problem of mine with English. Nothing personal. We have had our ups and downs but overall, we are fine. Although, I do feel that English doesn't really 'deserve' this majestic throne as the "Universal Language". It lacks so much!!! It doesn't have crucial features, and sometimes it can be just dumb. 

Features:

English doesn't have something I like to call "Degree of respect" which is a fancy way of talking about pronouns. Now, for an elder, the prime minister, a criminal, and your sibling, for all of these, you will/should use different levels of respect, respect decreasing as you move ahead in the list (Look, we both know you don't respect your sibling. Nothing to hide). But English doesn't have enough features!! EVERYONE IS A "YOU"!! In Hindi (Now I am assuming that all my readers do know Hindi), there are a bunch of degrees, "aap", "tum", "tu", "abbe oe" and a few more.

Tom Scott made an awesome video about this: https://youtu.be/QYlVJlmjLEc

English being dumb:

Silent Alphabets (grabs pillow and screams into it). Now, this is a pain all of us can understand. "tion" words, like 'dictation', 'mention', 'tradition', and about a bazillion more, are pronounced with a "shun". THEN WHY NOT JUST WRITE 'SHUN'???!!!! (flashbacks to all the marks cut because of spelling errors). If the word 'Wednesday' has the first 'd' silent in pronunciation, why can't it be hidden in writing? And which alphabet is silent in scent? Because its pronounced similar to cent AND sent. SO WHAT THE THE HELL IS EVEN GOING ON??!!

English is just straight up weird. Bow and bough are the same; E before I except on Tuesdays; 'beating around the bush' has nothing to do with bushes, and what not

I could go on for ages. But I will stop now. Because 1. I'm lazy, 2. I want people to actually read this.

So what did we learn? Basically, the brits never did anything right. End of story. Thank You. Bye.

Tall Girl (And other teen rom-coms)

 So Netflix released a teen rom-com in 2019, called "Tall Girl". Now, I know I'm late, and there are loads of reviews of it on YouTube. But I want to rant. So I will. 🙃

Now, if you are one of the few lucky ones who didn't watch this movie, don't worry. This isn't a review. I'll just be focusing on particular aspects of the movie.

This movie is about Jodi Kreyman, and it talks about how she is "very tall" and faces hardships because of it. One particular line of the movie caught a lot of attention.                                                                  Jodi:- 

Orphans, Starving Children, Cancer patients, Depressed kids, Black, Asians:- This.....just.....ARE YOU KIDDING ME??

Jodi is filthy rich, she lives in an actual mansion, her sister does beauty pageants and she goes to an above average high school. She has friends and an actual social life. Did I mention she lives in a MANSION.

Ok but for real now, Netflix has been making a lot of these Teen Rom-Com movies. They think these express the hardships of being a teen. They all have a common theme, the protagonist doesn't "fit in" and is usually bullied for it. The thing is, that is so not true. I am myself a teen. And these movies show that the problems are outside, as in bullies, friends etc. While this is true, the problems associated particularly with teenage is on the inside. There is a monster in our heads, ready to take any form, anxiety, stress, depression, FOMO and what not. Teens are at the highest risk of mental health issues. These movies are treating crucial topics in a not so serious way. That needs to change.

(I know I didn't focus much on humour and the Tall Girl, but I just needed to talk about this stuff. YouTube is filled with funny roasts and compilations.)